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me trying to comprehend why we have class on Presidents' Day

Are you playing basketball or just auditioning for a clown role?

I refresh SSOL at 11:59 and magically get the full class

These guys look like the ‘Dads’ of boy bands past.

When you wake up for work and realize you're still a bug.

When your friends say they're 'just coming over to hang out' but show up looking like a Vogue cover.

That pose says 'I’m already over this week'.

Trying to speak but your outfit's like, 'I'm the main character.'

Welcome to my TED Talk on aardvark economics!

That face when someone says pineapple belongs on pizza.

The bartender's wearing heels feels like Hamilton elevators up 0.5%.

Out here looking like a dog with daddy issues.

Is that a mic in your hand or a cry for help?

When you tell your date you’re low-maintenance but you’re actually a high-maintenance cat.

That leap is cuter than your last three dates combined.

When your grandma thinks you're still cute and not a mess.

Me questioning life after Dodge gym machines are all occupied.

When your face-off is more intense than your love life.

Me realizing 90k only gets me yelled at for my ID

When your outfit has more personality than you do.

When you dress like your personality—oversized and cartoonish.

Broke but flexing? You're the human version of a 99-cent store.

Vet visit or awkward performance review for a corporate cat

That dog knows more about fashion than you do, sweetie.