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With that smirk, he's definitely in the 'best follower' competition – sorry, not a chance!

Bro, your vibe is like expired milk.

Navigating Lerner is Columbia’s unofficial escape room.

If goofy was an Olympic sport, y'all would take gold.

That cape's not saving you from life, buddy.

When you find snacks, and suddenly, you’re a hero.

Freshmen during the freshman flu trying to stay awake in class

Like a smiling TA pretending the coding assignment isn't brutal.

More dapper than your last five Tinder matches combined.

Sipping iced coffee, dodging depth of Columbia’s existentialism.

When life is just one big nap break.

Is it Friday yet? Asking for a friend.

This man’s enthusiasm is the real horror movie.

Camus smirks; absurdity didn't predict her biceps.

Bro, you spent too much time contemplating that nap.

Gossiping about your life choices like it’s a heavenly soap opera.

When you're trying to look presidential but your WiFi is one bar away from complete despair.

Finance bros: "When you realize laughter is the only thing not taxed."

That umbrella's only for show—much like your personality.

me seeing my exam grade on Gradescope and collapsing

You be like 'I'm the main character,' but friend, you're an extra.

If only their policies were as sharp as their suits.

Hot Columbia guys: Caffeine required for sightings.

This dog’s smile is brighter than your future.